in the trenches

I am counting down the days.  Thursday was one of those days that 20 years from now I am going to recount it and laugh as a foible from my first year of teaching, but I really lost it. 

It's funny how the worst class at the start is your favourite class by the end, and that you hate you favourite class and can't wit to see them walk out the door, knowing - dreading - that you will see them again next year.  So my favourite class turned "I-hate-you-all" class is 3rd period.  A bunch of delinquent ninth graders, of which no less than 5 have been arrested this year. 

We were beginning to watch a movie.  They've just finished reading excerpts from "The Odyssey" and I was going to show the movie - assignment-free - for 4 days so they could have a picture and review before the test.  The movie hadn't been running 10 minutes when the power goes out in the portable.  I send a good kind over to a few of the other portables to see if they have power, and when they do, send him out to get maintenance.  When the maintenance guys get there, they tell me someone pulled the switch on the circuit breaker.  I look at the 2 sitting right next to it that it could have been. 

They both deny, and since I had already started them on questions in the book because the power was out, I told them all to continue working.  Two boys on the other side of the room begin laughing.  Not laughing because something is funny, but laughing because it was disruptive and loud.  When I threatened them with removal, they began farting; a time-honoured way to guarantee a disruption and attention.  Next, the two boys I stared down next to the breaker switch start loudly complaining that they have to do work instead of watching a movie.  I tell them and the rest of the class that because they cannot handle the simple task of watching a movie, they will have to take the test without it. 

Then my little thug starts talking to the kid next to him about how he's taking 4/20 off, getting high that afternoon, "Sure, I know where you can get whip-its," and then when I stand over him telling him that kind of conversation isn't welcome in my class, he says, "Miss you know what they be?"  (The English teacher in me shuddered.)  But when I restated, he told me that "it was his constitutional right to say whatever I want," to which I replied, "It isn't your constitutional right to disrupt my classroom with talk about illegal activities."

His retort: "Miss, some kids throw chairs at teachers......I'm just talking."

I stopped and looked at him, and I must say that I've felt a bit intimidated by students who were mad and larger than me, but this kid was threatening.  So I asked him point-blank, "Are you threatening me?"

"I'm just sayin', Miss."

Can you see this in your head?  It's all grainy and black and white?  Okay, not really.  In fact, I doubt this will be the only time I come up against threats I can't prove, but there it is.  I wrote him up, and hopefully won't have to see him for a few days. 

Friday came, and my AP told me that I had a few presents in my mailbox, so I go look.  BOTH farters, BOTH kids who I suspected could have flipped the breaker switch, AND the kid who left w/o permission to go to the restroom: 3 days OSS.  Thank You, GOD!  And Mr. AP.  Thank you, too.  Now that I know I've gotten rid of them, I may show the movie anyhow.

I've had a lovely Spring Break, and didn't get to a single thing that I meant to for the kids tomorrow.  Eeek!  I'll be spending a few hours preparing and grading papers tonight.  And of course, I have my own schoolwork to manage, as well.  I can't wait to be finally finished with my own degree...just one more year to go, although this summer, I have some work to do.

The "internship paperwork is due in about 6 weeks, and I need to take my FTCE professional exam, as well as my English certification exam before I take care of that.  It has been another lousy semester, and I think I am turning into a very poor student when I used to be a great one!  I fully expect to get a C in my "bird course" because the professor doesn't know how to test, and I laugh because faculty at the university don't take the classes that high school teachers must, and write the most horrible exams!  Now that I know how they are supposed to be written, it is glaringly obvious when they are done incorrectly. 

So tomorrow, I'll be doing introductory activities for Pirates! with my reading classes, reviewing for the Of Mice and Men exam with my 11th graders, and reviewing what we've already read and continuing reading of The Odessey with my 9th graders.  I can't wait to finish up with Odysseus and move on to poor Juliet and Romeo...I'm afraid I won't have enough time to finish!  I'll make it work, though.  The problem is that I don't have students who are advanced enough to give them a book and give them reading homework.  Number one, they have been trained throughout their years in school that they do not have to do homework, so I rarely get anything back, and they don't even pay attention and remember when the answers are pretty much handed to them on a plate, so...I don't really know how to handle them.

I finally realised that part of my issue is I cannot correct my missteps in teaching until the following year.  I'm afraid I won't remember, so I am going to try to do a better job of reviewing my own progress for use the next years.

I am 8 months into my first year of teaching with 2 more to go.  Spring Break is next week.  On both counts, all I can say is "hurry up!"

I am so tired I can't sleep.  I am so frustrated with my students' lack of motivation, manners, and responsibility that I only tell them to "fail quietly" if they complain about having to do something (meaning when they see the "F" on their report card, I don't want them to ask me how they got it).  I have given in on my first bit of pressure to change a grade rather than stand by my original assessment only because I don't have the energy.

To top it all off, I am surrounded by such negative energy from all of the people I work with (and with good reason, but...) that I am having a difficult time seeing the positives and optimism, if there are indeed any to be found.

Maybe I'll feel better after Spring Break.

So, here's the run-down I've been dealing with:

1. Teacher/student sex scandal at school involving the teacher buying alcohol for multiple students
2. Fight during lunch involving one of my students
3. One student being arrested (I know, my reaction was, "Only one?" too!)
4. A student being stabbed by a knife in the culinary arts classroom
5. A 9th grade class unable to manage safety scissors with any sort of responsibility
6. a 9th grade student throwing a temper tantrum on the floor like a 2-year-old, on his stomach, kicking and banging the floor with his fists
7. Students who flip out because they have an unexcused absence that affects their exam exemptions that they "NEED to change right now!"
8. Students who don't do anything all semester and the wonder why they got an F
9. Students who have been suspended for weeks at a time, and wonder why they have an F
10. Students who flip out because they got a B and they think they deserve an A

(did I mention I HATE report card day?)

Welcome to my world.  Watch the news; it's Friday so my school will be there.

This fight was in November, and we had another this past Feb... Just so you can get some idea about what it looks like in there, even if the video is crappy :-)

Okay, so I owe my headline to the Tampa Tribune, but I think they'll be okay with me stealing it for the time being.  Yesterday had to be one of the most interesting days I've had so far in my 7.5 months of teaching (has it been that long already?).  This year was the first time my district has had classes on Good Friday.  There was hoopla last year because the Muslim community wanted the holiday of Eid off, and the district finally threw up their hands and moved to a completely secularized calendar.  But students were told all they had to do was get a note from Mom and Dad and they would have an excused absence.  The district had 1/3 of the school bus drivers take a personal day, as well as 40% of the cafeteria workers and custodians, and many teachers.  We were missing 20 out of 135 or so.  But hey, let me tell you how it turned out....

I had 10 kids all day.  Four in 1st period, 1 each in 2nd and 3rd periods, 2 in 4th, 2 in 5th, and a big fat 0 in 6th.  Since I have 7th off, I left at 1 pm.  We have around 2100 kids, and we had 250.  I don't know how many signed out by the end of the day, but there weren't 250 kids there when I left. 

We watched the news, played Guitar Hero and Dance Dance Revolution, played Cranium, and figured out riddles and brain teasers (current events, critical thinking, debate, music, PE, and analysis...see?  It wasn't a wasted day!).  I just couldn't believe we wasted taxpayer dollars to keep schools open for this. 

No, not the dance.  He's been deployed with the 82nd Airborne in Iraq since January 2007.  Christmas 2006 was the 1st Christmas we spent with him since 2003, and we missed this last one too...this was his 3rd deploy.  I can't wait to see him!  I've always had something really (hmph) important going on or was on my way and missed the actual landing and haven't seen him come home to the base yet, so this will be my first trip there. 

Mom says that it's really neat.  There is a small band (Army band) and always lots of people.  He's going to be one of the first planes in, and I saw the first piece of official news about their homecoming today in my Google alert... (82nd Return From Baghdad Made Official). 

Last time, we heard there were delays we were advised about, and we were set to head down (we were staying in Raleigh and had to get down to Fayetteville), but then he ended up coming home early.  That upset my mom, that she wasn't able to be there, but we were more than happy just to have him home. 

So I've arranged for a substitute who speaks English, and have the well-wishes of my department head and principal (it is FCAT week, after all)...this from the guy who said, "The only excuse for missing FCAT week is if Gramma is having twins."  Which is nice to know.  My department head said she would talk to the principal for me, and it went fine.  Apparently he's very pro-military, which serves my own purposes, I guess.  Funny how people's personal opinions can help you out on occasion, but more often than not they screw you over.  I'll just be sure to remember this one. 

But all in all, this is about my brother, family, and us being together after 15 months of hell.  Even though I know you can die just as easily on US soil, it's a load off my shoulders when he's here. 

I can't wait!!!!!!